Facebook is a virtual home that is getting real. People are migrating to that home and they’re moving in droves. Facebook has something for everyone and everyone for something. Everybody, yes everybody is there, with all their annoying stuff as well.
Tag here, tag there. What’s all that for huh? Do you think it’s easy to brush off when a friend tags you in a super embarrassing shot of you especially when you did those stupid things you didn’t have to worry about way back in high school? Or when they show your struggle with beauty at high school until you grew this long hair. Nothing hurts worse than the constant notification, something like “Henry commented on a photo of you.” You think, “Gosh! So he’s seen me that way.” I’m so sad. If you wanted the picture on FB you'd post it yourself, right?
Using the lol acronym too much… lol. Did people forget what lol stands for? You see this and you think that dude’s losing it. “I’m in a café...lol”, “I hate examination...lol”, “At a friend’s funeral... lol”. What’s up? Is it a period at the end of every sentence? You use lol as a verb, a noun, an adverb; a past-perfect pronoun and you've even dangled its participle. You're an loladdict. But the thing is, you just throw it in there to let everyone know that what you are saying is a joke. LOL means Laughing Out Loud. So next time you’re in a café or a funeral, please don’t laugh out loud.
The “I’m in the bathroom. Undressing. Removing my ...’kind of posts’. Heard of twitter? Where you can let people know what you’re doing every second? The URL is www.twitter.com, free and quick registration, absolute fun getting people to follow you, and you can scribble those posts in few words. Goodbye, see you soon.
Putting absolutely nothing on your profile. You telling me your real name is Rock Shake’EmOff Baby, your hometown is Burma Camp and you live in Kumasi and you are related to Prissy ILuvChocolate4fan . Seriously, are we here to joke? Whiles some people are really using Facebook as a tool to brand themselves, others are just exhibiting their ignorance.
Older people interfering with flow, and religious leaders too. Hak, 21, posts “Loved last night. Best night out ever. And the girls wow! #$#@!”. Nit, 47, comments, “Wise up. Don’t be like your dad in the 80s.” Ha-ha, this member of the older generation cut off all comments. All I can do is like your post Hak.
Miss. Attention-Craving Drama Queen This updater needs to make sure people are worried or concerned about her at all times, so she updates her Facebook status with things that beg people to respond with "What happened?" or "Are you all right?" And instead of having a real problem, she's baited you into responding because "her roommate didn't say hi to her this morning." The problem with this annoying updater is after she cries wolf with a few of these faux problems, she could update her Facebook with "I'm in the process of getting stabbed in the face, someone please help me!" and you'll a) not believe her or b) be the one who's doing the stabbing.
"It's Complicated" Why is it complicated? It’s complicated…because you’re married? Have unresolved daddy issues? An inept womanizer? The only legitimate answer to this question is, it’s complicated because the divorce proceedings you are involved in are not moving along as quickly as you’d like, in which case, YOU’RE SOO SINGLE! But if you still think your relationship is so complicated that you have to identify it as such on your Facebook profile, get off Facebook and go fix your relationship.
FRAPE This is where one of your friends or someone you know leaves there account signed into unattended, you then hop onto their computer and enter a really stupid or rude message into the status bar and they end up changing their entire friend’s profile.
Poke you non stop Some people must have nothing else to do because they log on to Facebook and then sit there for hours poking their friends. In a lot of cases this is non-stop and can go on for hours.If their friend is not poking them back then they should not continue to constantly poke that person. Even if the friend does poke back, what is the point of keeping this poking session going for the next hour?
Girls taking pouty faced pictures of themselves We’ll never be free from these girls. Somehow, they think they’re twice as attractive with this face. When digital cameras came out, so did the lips & throwing the peace sign. I thought it was just a phase, now I know the awful truth. Just to keep from losing my mind, I imagine they’ve just ate some sour oranges just before they snapped the pic. Either that or the sour taste of their own self-image has forever pickled their palette. Gentlemen, if you ever find yourself about to be in a picture with one of these girls, it is your civic duty to back out.
Adored on Facebook, ignored in life Your friends like your status updates, your wall is full of posts, and your photos are littered with comments because you’re always updating with some kind of catchy and exotic phrases, but try making a phone call or text message to any number of these people and you’d think they were ignoring you. Newsflash; THEY ARE. Because in real life you some boring ignored character who feeds on Facebook to feel good about yourself. Stop misleading yourself you are not any celebrity.
Misuse of the Like button When someone says that a friend or family member has passed away it is usually recommended to comment by saying something like ‘my deepest condolence’ and not select the Like button.
They Let Their idiocies Show What is it about Facebook that makes even cool, down-to-earth people post quotes like "It's not the size of the dog in the fight, but the size of the fight in the dog," write status updates that read, "I am not a SWAG KING but KING OF THE SWAG," and upload photos of themselves with wannabe-model gazes that they obviously took in the bathroom mirror? Duh!! It’s the bathroom, that’s where all the nasty stuff goes on!! Maybe they think it's funny or impressive, but the behavior only makes us roll our eyes.
Random song lyrics in the news feed. It’s actually ok some days if you just don’t have anything to say on Facebook. Maybe you just want to check in and see how your friends are doing. There’s nothing wrong with that, not at all. Some people it appears, feel they must share something so if they have nothing happening, they just put up some random song lyric that pops into their head. I’m looking at your updates, curious about how your day is going but instead, you’ve posted the entire first verse of GRENADE. In fact it took so many posts to get your lyrics out to the world that it pushed all of the other updates off the first page of my news feed.
Update Facebook profile when you’re supposedly ill How many times have we seen it? Someone calls the lecturer in the morning pretending to be sick and then updates their Facebook profile minute-by-minute throughout the day, documenting a day of ice cream, fried rice, movies and jumping on the bed. Get dressed and go for lectures because Prof. Kofi G. is your friend on Facebook, that’s if you’ve forgotten or else you’ll probably miss an impromptu mid-sem. And it’d be your own fault for adding your lecturer to be your friend on Facebook.
Unwanted Groups One of Facebook’s more recent improvements allows other users to make their friends members of groups. When I read about Mark Zuckerberg himself getting stealthily included in a NAMBLA group, I thought it would have brought an end to this, but I recently realized that I have been added by my wannabe friends to over 20 Movement pages. The recent one being “The Sweet Mistake Movement” which I have no idea what it’s about.
Upload drunken pictures the morning after Have a little decency for yourself. If you go out for a big one on a Wednesday night and you happen to lose it, posting humiliating photos of you & your friends on Thursday morning is a recipe for disaster. Because when you go for that job interview on Thursday your interviewees might want to ask permission and check your Facebook profile and imagine them seeing pictures of you seriously drunk making a fool out of yourself. Yeah right we know what will happen.